Imperfection

I've never claimed to be perfect. In fact, I'm not even a perfectionist. Jeff will rip out his knitting over and over and over until he has it perfect. If I find an error in my work I'll go back and fix it if the solution is easy. Otherwise I'm more than happy to just accept that there will be issues with my knitting project. My current mittens (my first pair) have one thumb that is inside out. I still wear them, mostly proudly.

So why is it that when I come to other creative work (writing, drawing, painting) or dieting, I expect myself to be perfect. I sit down to write, put one sentence on the screen, and instantly erase it because the words aren't perfect. I write half a story and then stop because so far it hasn't been the masterpiece I'm looking for. I draw images of small furry animals and then instantly erase them because they aren't perfect re-creations. It's frustrating.

And I'm even worse when it comes to dieting. In November I started writing my food choices down again. I'm trying to stay under an 1800 calorie diet. And most of the time it works well. I'm feeling better, I'm eating better. I've even started walking three to four days a week. And some days I go over calories. And it is a constantly struggle every time it happens not to give up and just eat whatever I want. I have to remind myself to just restart the next day. I'm demanding perfection of myself and that's not fair. No one is perfect. So my first drawings won't be masterpieces, my first drafts will be terrible, and each day I may or may not stay within my calorie limit. The important thing is that I keep trying, imperfections and all. Now if I could only remember that.