Stopping By the Woods...

...On a not so snowy evening.

I went out for a walk this afternoon. I've never had a regular exercise routine but I love to walk. It's something that I feel I could do for hours and still never get tired. I used to walk for an hour and still be just as refreshed as when I started. Most of the time I would walk fast, feeling my breath and heartbeat speed up. Nowdays I often go with a set of binoculars and a camera and most of the time I just stroll. I have a path not far from the house that is "far from the maddening crowd" and I headed that way. The moment you get away from the road the car noise drops to a minimum. It is peace incarnate.

I had a decent walk but my ankle still bothers me so I turned around after a half hour and headed for home. The route home is uphill and I was panting a little by the time I reached the top. I'm a bit out of shape lately. After I walked under the underpass, stopping to listen to the mourning doves that sound like monsters when echoed around the bridge, I headed up the last hill for home. But I didn't go in. Instead I headed straight for the creek. I sat down on the ravine edge, pulled my coat around me, and sat. It was relatively quiet. I could hear the birds and a distant squirrel chewing. Other than the occasional car (we live off a pretty busy street) all I could hear was the rushing of water and the wildlife.

It was the closest thing I've found to heaven. The air and ground were cold but after I got used to it, the temperature was just part of the moment. I sat and watched the woods get darker and darker. I could feel the moment when the temperature dropped as the sun went down. In one moment I went from snug to seeing my breath. But I still didn't go in. I just sat there, not really thinking, not really worrying, just sitting. It was meditation. It was bliss.

Poetry Wednesday

Because I feel like it. I never seem to post on Fridays anymore so today will be a Poetry Wednesday. It rained yesterday and for some odd reason I felt like going out hiking. I've been enjoying the rain (mostly because it isn't snow) and am feeling very energetic. I've been waking up earlier and earlier on the weekends and going out walking. I've walk through snow and rain and mud and clear blue days. But unlike my poem for the day, one of the few times I don't walk is at night. Not sure why, I just hate walking in the evenings.

But it's still a great poem.

Acquainted With the Night

by Robert Frost

I have been one acquainted with the night.

I have walked out in rain--and back in rain.

I have outwalked the furthest city light.

I have looked down the saddest city lane.

I have passed by the watchman on his beat

And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain.

I have stood still and stopped the sound of feet

When far away an interrupted cry

Came over houses from another street.

But not to call me back or say good-by;

And further still at an unearthly height

One luminary clock against the sky.

Proclaimed the time was neither wrong nor right.

I have been one acquainted with the night.

You Can't Have Just One

Okay if you thought I was insane before, today I proved that I'm certifiable. How you ask? Well today, for no other reason than that it seemed like a good idea at the time, I started a new blog. Yeah another blog. Apparently they are addictive. You start one and then suddenly it snowballs into...well...my current count is four. They're like potato chips, you can't have just one.

My new endeavour is just beginning so no need to check it out quite yet. But this one has a goal. It's called Weekly Walks and I'll be using it to showcase photos, descriptions, and my thoughts about the hikes I'm planning to take weekly. As part of my ankle rehabilitation I decided that I need a bit of a motivator to get out and walk. This blog is my answer.

My hope is to post at least once or twice a week, so this won't be a regular thing. But I hope to fill it with pictures, most likely of animals, birds, or scenery. Something new, something exciting. Did I mention I'm insane?

A Perfect Night

If it seems like I've been distant from the internet lately, it's because I have. I haven't been on Facebook in days. Haven't checked email since we got back in town. And really haven't been online most of the day except for my brief lunch breaks. Work is ganging up on me and I haven't had a ton of time to spare.

So last night after working late again, I had planned to go home, make up a salad, and sit on the couch mindlessly watching TV. Jeff had other ideas. As I brought out my salad fixings he meekly suggested going out. And of course I couldn't pass that up. We headed over to one of the local sports bars and found a table outside on the patio. It was beautiful yesterday but we had the patio completely to ourselves. It was heaven. I ordered a beer and their amazingly tasty (and possibly good for me) taco salad. Then Jeff made me an offer I simply couldn't refuse. His deal was that we would go to the library as long as I walked around the nearby lake with him. Okay so I get to go to my favorite place in the world, and I get to go on a beautiful walk. Sign me up!!!

After dinner we headed over to the library and walked the lake. It's not a huge lake and we took our time in the walking. Jeff and I tend to get distracted by interesting bugs, pretty flowers, birds or animals of any sort...well pretty much everything. It was just nice to be out. I'm working on walking on rough terrain to strengthen my ankle even more. I'm still not 100% but I'm getting better. After the walk we went to our own different sections of the library. I picked up the second book in the Bone series by Jeff Smith. I've been loving this graphic novel series but have been taking my time reading them. The series follow Fone Bone and his cousins Phoney and Smiley who, after being kicked out of Boneville, find themselves being chased by rat creatures, saved by a dragon, and befriended by a young girl and her ultra tough grandmother. The characters are all unique and the plot has me both intrigued and confused. I need to pick up the pace with this series.

I picked up a graphic novel called Wonderland written and illustrated by Tommy Kovac and Sonny Liew. This is the first in a series of graphic novels following the exploits of Wonderland's characters without Alice. This one followed Mary Ann, the housemaid for the White Rabbit and her adventures with the Queen of Hearts and the Queen of Spades. I'll be curious to pick up the next book. I love take-offs on Alice in Wonderland and these are inventive and downright beautiful. The story is a wonderful reinvention of the world and is very much in the spirit of the original book. The book's artwork is stunning, a great mix of detailed and surreal landscapes with well created characters. I'd seen the artwork before and had been meaning to check out the book.

I also picked up a biography of Edward Gorey and a book on the making of Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (Gene Wilder version). After the library Jeff and I stopped for ice cream and I went home to read. I finished the two graphic novels and started the "making of" book. I'll be through it before the weekend is up. As I sat on the couch last night, surrounded by books and finishing up my ice cream, all I could think was that last night was a perfect night. I feel completely refreshed today. It's amazing what unplugging does for me.

Bracingly Good News

I meant to write yesterday. I had time to write in the morning but wanted to wait until after my doctor's appointment to do one last post about my recovery. After my appointment I had errands to run, new shoes to buy, and some friends I was meeting for dinner and drinks. I didn't get home until late and after the beer I had with dinner I wasn't feeling very writerly. So no post. And in some ways I'm glad I waited until this morning. I wanted to talk about my appointment but wasn't really sure how to explain the excitement and disappointment it had elicited.

I'm not sure what I was expecting. I hoped to get my boot off. I hoped to see some good healing. I got some of my wishes. I'm mostly healed, mostly. There is still a big gap in the ankle bone that the doctor has decided is either probably not going to heal or will take a good year to heal. But he's not worried about it either. No further corrections needed on that. I also still have a dagger like bone fragment that will probably always be a bit ajar in the back of my foot. But no worries on that either. So I'm healing and stable.

I got rid of the boot only to trade it in for a brace which I'll wear for another month. I'm not to take a step on the foot without the brace and a shoe on. I can sleep with it off but the rest of my walking time I must have it on. I'm not sure how I feel about this. The brace is painful in ways that the boot never was. It's an added element that complicates dressing in the morning or late night bathroom visits. But it also allows me to wear real shoes again. And more importantly it allows me to walk like a human again. I can now walk with a bend to my ankle. I can go up and down steps like a normal person. I'm finally able to really start rehabilitating that ankle.

The big news for me though was that in a month I can get rid of the brace and be fully healed. I can start returning to all of my old activities. I can hopefully stop thinking about my ankle, stop worrying about it. And more importantly I don't have to go back to the doctor. No three month follow-ups. No yearly visits. Done! That may be the best sign I could ask for that I'm healing. I've been released by the doctor. I'll still do Physical Therapy for the next month (only because I begged) but no more x-rays. No more waiting rooms. Done! Three months has never gone so slow and so fast at the same time. Now just one more month to go.

These Boots Are Made for Walking

That's why they call it a walking boot.

This post is a tribute and hopefully a send-off to my long hated, long loved walking boot. I go see the doctor on Monday and pretty much everyone agrees that I will probably be told that I don't need it any longer. It's been 13 weeks since surgery which doesn't seem like a lot until I say three months. I've been wearing this boot since January 4th and although it's been incredibly helpful, durable, and sometimes comfortable I'm ready to say goodbye.

I was casted in the emergency room with a removable plaster cast. It was heavy and frustrating. But I didn't really hate it. I didn't have it on long enough to hate it. When I woke up from surgery it had been removed. Instead I was staring at a gigantic black walking boot. The same one you see below. It was heavier than the plaster. It was more cumbersome and for the first two weeks, served no real purpose other than that it was removable.

When I first started wearing it I couldn't even remove the damn thing by myself. I couldn't bend enough to pull off the far straps. At least I couldn't without putting some weight on my foot which was strictly taboo at the time. After a while pulling the boot on and off got easier. But it wasn't comfortable. With my leg wrapped in gauze and Ace bandages it was constantly rubbing. Once the bandages were gone it became comfortable. And about that time I could actually start putting some weight on the leg. After two weeks I was using the boot the way it was meant to be used, with weight bearing. But I still hated it. I chafed my foot and leg. It smelled after only a couple days of wear. I could only wash it occasionally and that was almost always more a nuisance than it was worth. Sleeping with it was frustrating (and still is) and I still wasn't able to really walk. I was still crutch-bound, just with a huge leg weight.

It wasn't until 8 weeks that I really started to appreciate it. Once I started physical therapy and slowly did away with the crutches, I realized the value of this gigantic fake appendage. It protected. It soothed. It walked. I've been walking for a couple weeks now without the crutches. I've become comfortable walking. Other than the occasional really high curb I can pretty much go anywhere without a thought. I can carry things without worry. I'm back using my purse rather than the backpack. I'm feeling mostly human again. And now I an even better chance of feeling normal. I'll finally be able to wear matching shoes. Here's hoping that will be Monday.

Good Health News

This break has been one of the most difficult and frustrating things in my life. I don't even want to admit the number of times that I've thought about just staying in and not leave the house for the next couple months. I've thought about never leaving the couch unless I had to. I've been in pain, afraid, and frustrated by hauling myself around on my hands. I've nearly fallen from the crutches hundreds of times. Anyone who tells you that crutches are no big deal is lying...or selling you something.

But with all this frustrating something else has happened. I'm amazed at how easily I can be made happy. The first time I dressed myself with the boot on was a moment of joy. The first time I opened a door on my own I was texting Jeff to share my excitement. When I first learned the step to get into the house, I was practically in tears with joy. I've become easy to please.

And today was a great day. I went to the doctor and finally got my staples out. The wounds are healing well and soon I won't be needing gauze or the ace bandage. But even better news was that I can start bending my ankle. In fact I should be working nightly to bend and flex the foot to improve mobility. The first time the doctor helped me bend my foot back felt bizarre. Apparently my ankle has forgotten how to move.

And that wasn't even the best news. The big thing is that I can finally start putting weight on the foot. I'm shocked!!! Two weeks after surgery and I can start putting 10-20 pounds on the foot. That's enough to use my leg to steady myself. I'm four legged now. And I'm so thankful. It took Jeff months before he could step on his foot again (he didn't have surgery) and I'm starting to walk after just two weeks. I could have kissed my doctor when he said it. And I'm on a perpetual high today. Yesterday I hardly left the couch if I didn't have to (I've been having a lot of pain in my hands) and today I'm up and moving as often as possible. I would say that I'm easy to please but this was just way too good of information. I feel like I'm really on the road to recovery now.

A Cure for All My Ailments

What if I would tell you that I have found the one thing that will help me lose weight, improve my mood, keep my anxiety at bay, increase my energy, and lengthen my life expectancy. It's pretty simple. In fact, I learned about it at the ripe old age of 1 year old. It's walking. The first and only thing that I have ever found that takes care of almost all my issues. You would think with all those benefits it would be something that I would be dedicating tons of time to. Yet for some reason I find it tough to get out the door.

Jeff and I went walking this afternoon. We wanted to try out a path that has been built near the house and I loved just getting out into the trees and putting one foot in front of the other. In fact, I'm always happy when I'm walking. I don't remember the last time I took a walk and didn't enjoy myself. Even though I don't really like to walk along busy streets I won't turn it down. My favorite walks though are when I leave the trails. Strap on my hiking boots and step off the beaten path. This picture is from a hike Jeff and I took along the creek near our house. We found all sorts of interesting plant life, spotted a couple of deer, and found our way a couple miles from the house, just following a creek. It was one of my favorite walks.

But I still find it tough to motivate myself. I look out the door and think that it's just too much work to put on my shoes. Or find a coat. And the couch just seems comfier. So I put off going. And then feel lazy and even worse. A simple walk everyday would be all I need to improve my life. Now I just need to get moving. My plan (kind of like a resolution) would be to take a walk every other day weather depending. I'm not about to become one of those crazy people you see walking in torrential rains or in a blizzard. But on nice days there is no reason I shouldn't get out and walk when I can. When I lost all that weight four years ago I did it simply through walking more and writing down what I eat. And getting out simply makes my anxiety go away. With those bonuses alone, I need to make an effort to get out there and walk. Here's hoping I can keep the pace up.