Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Delivery Pains

I'm going to get hate mail on this one but it's what's on my mind.

One of the younger guys in my office and his wife had a baby on Monday. The couple had been trying for a long time and news of her pregnancy had been the talk of the office for the last couple months. All the talk was surprising considering that there are plenty of people in this office who I don't even know if they are married or not. I've overheard coworkers who have been working together for 15 years of so asking whether the other has kids. It's not a gossipy office. Most people just go to their cubes and work. So when the father started telling everyone, and I mean everyone, word spread and people got excited.

The baby was born on Monday. It was planned. The office received news that afternoon about the details and a couple pictures. The father was taking the week off to spend time with his new daughter and his wife. So I was a tad shocked when he walked into the office this morning, went to his desk, and started working. Two days after his wife delivers their first child he is back at work, and on a vacation day. Now I can't think of anything in the world that would make me come into the office on a vacation day. Perhaps I'm just not as attached to my job as I should be. But to come in two days after having a baby seems a bit extreme.

So all this morning I've been wondering why. Is there just so much stuff to do at the office that he felt the need to come into work? This young man is busy like the rest of us but I can't think of anything that couldn't wait a week or so. Now he's always been a bit of a workaholic but as a woman, I know I wouldn't have let my husband out of the house two days after a birth. If it's not work, is it the fact that he now has to deal with both his wife and his mother-in-law. But then why come into the office. He's on vacation. I would go anywhere except the office when I'm on vacation. The only other thing I can think of is that he is coming to work to relax. A new baby is stressful. There is the lack of quiet and lack of sleep. There is the constant stress of taking care of a brand new life. That explanation makes sense to me. I doubt that this young man gave too much thought to how much his life was going to change after having a baby. I can only imagine that he is here to rest. But I still think that his wife should probably be pissed. I know I would be.


Nereeza said...

I bet the wife doesn't even know that he snuck out of the house.. :)

.. you know how new mothers can be, the baby is the main new focus from birth on, not so much more their husband..

And he's probably hiding out from all things pink and babyish.. :)

Hi Myraina! Hi Thoryk!

Cat B said...

Hiya Nez,
Long time, no see. Hope things have been well with you, and with the guild. I miss the people quite a bit although I find that I don't miss the game.

I would bet you are right that the wife possibly hasn't noticed. I know that babies are time-consuming (another reason I'm not having any) but I guess I just assumed that he would want to spend all his time with his new daughter. Although perhaps the pink is driving him crazy. I know it would drive me nuts.

Nette said...

This makes me a tad angry inside. We have two kids (as you know Cat), and that first week after having a baby is so trying. Even if baby is priority, the wife is still in pain and her body is still trying to adjust to everything that is going on. For him to walk away after two days makes me upset. I realize he may have needed time away - that's cool, but to work?

All I can think of is how much I needed Drew and how awesome he was helping me through that first week - both times. I would have gone even more crazy than I already was if I didn't have him beside me.

Ok, I'll get off my box now.

...and Hi Nez! (this is Riita)

Cat B said...


I was initially shocked that he would come in and then I was angry. That's why I had to write about it. We don't have kids, as you know, but I still can imagine how angry I would be if Jeff left me alone with a new baby right after giving birth.

You guys are lucky that you have each other. I'm glad Drew was there for you after the births. I couldn't imagine him pulling something like this guy did.

Then again I think you guys are a great couple. And of course your girls are wonderful. Such a great family. Hopefully we'll see you guys in April.