Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Sheer Terror

I'm not a horror fan. I can read some horror stories, and I enjoy older grade B horror films but most of the time I avoid the genre. And I'll freely admit that I'm very rarely brave. That being said I tend to be pretty even keeled. Few things bother me or offend me. 

But tomorrow morning I intend to put myself willingly through torture. No I'm not auditioning for the most recent slasher/torture film. Instead I'm going to the dentist for a checkup. 

Yes I can hear you laughing now. The dentist shouldn't bother me. I have a pretty clean dental record. No cavities since I was five. Never had a root canal or a crown put on. My teeth are thankfully still all my own. Other than having some wisdom teeth pulled I haven't had a lot of traumatic dental experiences. 

In fact dental work was pretty routine for quite a while. I'm not sure but I estimate that I had 13 years of orthodontia work. Braces, retainers, skin grafts, you name it. I got to the point I would just sit in the chair, close my eyes, and tell them to do whatever they needed to do. Monthly visits to the orthodontist almost always included some sort of painful device or at least the tightening of those painful devices. Braces should be implemented as torture devices. No need to waterboard, just have them deal with braces for 4 and a half years. 

And sadly my teeth aren't much better than they used to be. So lately I jump around between dentists looking for one who will treat me with kid gloves. I go for years between visits. And that makes each trip terrifying. I'm scared that my checkup tomorrow will end with comments like, "We'll have to schedule a follow up to do the drilling" or "I just think a retainer/braces would be the best option for you." Living nightmare. 

I have given blood for years with never a whimper. I have done MRIs, EEG, blood tests, and treadmill tests with no real worry. I even considered going under the knife just recently for a herniated disc. All without fear. But novocaine shots make me cry like a little girl. So wish me luck tomorrow. Hopefully it will again be another clean bill of health. Or at least not as terrifying as I'm expecting. 

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