I have an odd love/hate relationship with WoW recently. I love the time I get to spend raiding and instancing. I enjoy the times where the quests are going quickly. I love that it is active but at the same time doesn't require the same consciousness that writing does. I hate how much time it takes. I hate the repetitive kills and exploring the same places I've gone before. I hate that it takes so much of my productivity away. I love the guild, and love hanging out with them. They are all wonderful people. But I hate the fact that I have spent so much time indoors this summer.
And more than anything I'm frustrated by the fact that when I am playing WoW regularly, I pretty much stop writing. For some reason these things are mutually exclusive for me. When I am writing regularly I don't log on and then I find myself missing the game a bit, and the guild a lot. When I'm playing regularly, I miss writing and creating. Like an recovering alcoholic, I can't seem to just have one. I can't make that choice. I feel guilty for not writing and I feel guilty for not playing. I probably shouldn't be writing this tonight. I try to keep this place a more positive place and don't normally air my neurotic thoughts. But I just had to sit down and talk about this struggle. I'm not sure why I can't do both.
All I know is that writing is hard. I am constantly worried about offering my words to the world. I know I shouldn't worry about what others think, but for anyone who knows me, well...no surprise there. And since writing is hard, I find myself playing to avoid having to deal with the writing. And the moment I log on I regret it. And the moment I log off, I look at my writing and regret logging off. Again sorry. Kind of a downer post. I just had to get everything out. Weird night.
3 comments:
I don't blog nearly as much as i used to, tho' i own a livejournal..
.. but do what i do, and multitask more - play WOW in maximized Windowed mode and keep Firefox/Notepad/other open in other tabs/windows..
Then when inspiration strikes, or if you're just flying from place to place, jot down a few thoughts and your writing just might improve without being an exclusive pasttime..
Oh, and some people play on laptops (cringe) and some do it outside (doublecringe) so it IS possible..
Hmm.. Thoryk's on one of his alts, and i often wonder, where is Myraina?? :)
Yes, but the problem is that Thoryk's always on...
;-P
Nez,
I've tried to stay up with the blogging even if I'm not doing a ton of other writing. I should try to take Thoryk's laptop outside. Yes he plays on a laptop.
And you are right. I should keep a notebook with me. If nothing else I can draw during flights. I'm not why I've always seen it as an either/or.
Myraina won't get much play time except raiding and instancing anymore. I've done all the leveling I care to do with her. Hraitha is my next. I'll level her as high as I can then start another. I'm a serial monogomist when it comes to my characters. And I'll try to be on more.
Thoryk,
You're not always on...just some of the ti...most of the ti...no actually you do seem to be on all the time. Like at 3 in the morning. :-)
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