I Should Have Been a Pirate

When I was very young I wanted to be a pirate. I was, and still am, drawn to the sea and sailing. I loved the idea of living it up on some far away island. I was a bit too young to understand the risks of death that went along with being a pirate. Or the miserable living conditions. Or even the concept that it may not have been the fun romanticized version I read in books or saw in movies. It didn't matter that I didn't want to kill people or steal things. I wanted to be a pirate.

And I did have something that seemed perfect for the job. I had an eyepatch. Not the standard costume eyepatch with a skull and crossbones on the front (although now I would proudly wear that). No, I actually had an eyepatch for medical reasons. The same reason I've worn glasses since I was six month old. (yes they make them that small). I had the eyepatch and the glasses because I only have one good eye.

After I was born my mother noticed that one of my eyes would be looking at her, and the other would be looking off towards something else. She immediately made an appointment with an eye doctor and we ended up getting sent to Iowa City to an eye specialist. He found the problem quickly. I have a huge hole in the back of my eye. Kind of makes it hard to see with that big hole blocking things up. And the reason my bad eye drifts is because I don't actually look out of it much. They immediately bought me protective glasses which I took great pains to destroy. I was such a grateful child. (when I'm really tired or not paying attention, my eye still drifts quite a bit)

Now I can see somewhat out of that eye. I have peripheral vision but no central vision. If I lose my good eye I have to learn braille. I wouldn't be able to drive. I'd be legally blind. I was protected constantly through my childhood. I was told not to do things that my other brothers and sisters got to do for fear that I'd "put out an eye". I was fourteen before I climbed my first tree. Yeah I know, sad. But then again, without good depth perception, I might have had problems with the tree anyway.

The doctor wanted to make sure that I still used my bad eye though. So I was prescribed an eyepatch. I was to wear the patch around at home over my good eye to strengthen the bad one. I wore it for a while until I learned to read. Then all bets were off. I couldn't read with the thing on so I immediately stopped it. But even at that age I'd proudly say that I had one...and that I was a pirate.

I mention all this because I was reading BBC news on Friday and found an article about retinal detachments (which is what I have) particularly those affecting central vision. There is a new type of therapy called eccentric viewing which can allow some people with no central vision to learn to read. And I think I'm going to try it. I read a little on the program over the weekend and was really excited about it. The therapy teaches you to read using your peripheral vision. It also teaches you to look through the vision field that offers you the best image. This therapy could be huge for me. This could offer me the chance to feel a little more normal when it comes to sight. It may even tighten up that eye so it drifts a little less. I might become a little less protective of my good eye. Or at least not have to worry about learning braille. But more than anything it offers me a chance to dust off that old eyepatch. Arggh. I'm a pirate. :-)